[Edit: I considered just deleting this post which I would normally do but in this case, I think it could be a good learning experience for those deciding to live in Vietnam. As one person emailed me in the past, you can't hide all the negatives stating, sarcastically, that even the US has it's share of problems. 
]
Normally I do not get very personal with my blog entries at SaigonNezumi.com, I tend to leave those at Livejournal. I TRY NOT to be negative whenever possible instead focusing the positives of Vietnam. This has really helped me change my perspective of Vietnam in positive manner. I do get a couple of complaints for being too positive but overall, many of the people who visit my site really enjoy it.
Sometimes, though, I think it I should talk more about the negatives of living in Vietnam. I mean the real negatives for a Japanese Amerasian such as myself. No, I do not consider the building construction or electricity problems in my neighborhood as a negative. I found them to be a positive since I got to learn more than I ever imagined about my house and my neighbors.
The gossip is not a negative. The higher prices are not a negative. Heavy traffic, pollution, the crazy heat, these are not real negatives for me. For me, the ‘real’ negatives about living in Vietnam are the ‘ones’ that may actually make you consider leaving Vietnam.
For many Expats, some of the above, if not all, may be those negatives. For some Western guys, finding out that their Vietnamese girlfriend are not who they ‘thought’ they were is that one such negative. For many, many others, the Vietnamese culture and way of life is probably the number 1 ‘negative’ that ‘convinced’ them finally to leave Vietnam.
For me, those are not good enough reasons to leave Vietnam. After living here for nearly four years, I consider those to be weak, or put more bluntly, stupid reasons for leaving Vietnam. Don’t get me wrong, a year ago I would have left for the above reasons.
This incident with my iPhone nearly got close to being one of those ‘real’ negatives. Why? Because I got to see the true side of a person that, at one time, I honestly thought about marrying and who I considered a friend. It does not matter what country you live in, it hurts when you see the true side of someone finally coming out.
And for me, it gets worse. Her family still has not dropped the matter. At about 8:30 PM, I received an SMS from her brother that said:
Why thank? What kind of guy u’re asking return gift after break up. Penis still alive? Stop disturb me cheap ass hole and be carefull with ur lie words about my sis since u’re still in vietnam.
It made no sense because my ex-girlfriend was very explicit in her email that our relationship ended a long time ago:
…remember or not, just 3 months knowing you, i said goodbye..and then there was a stupid guy keep sending cards for 4th, 5th,….12th months anniversary while knowing i was having other boyfriend.
That was back in 2006! She said it ended in March, 2006, to me the relationship ended in June/July, 2006. We never hugged, kissed, etc., with each other since! The relationship was over a year and a half when she agreed to buy my iPhone and yes, she had a boyfriend then. We were friends.
And 5 months later, this nearly created a ‘real’ negative about living in Vietnam for me. All because I asked, her to return the iPhone after she failed to carry her end of the business deal. All she had to do was return it, no arguments. Not wait another two months before having her mother return it.
And if it was truly a gift, why would the family have her brother threaten me? Yeah I know I am a former Marine but the point it why go to such efforts? This is not normal even by Vietnamese standards especially since she told me that she has:
…2 new iphones with 8GB and 16GB also Nokia if you interest in buying..
plus the O2 her boyfriend bought her. What’s the purpose of keeping an old 4 GB iPhone if you already own 4 other mobile phones? And how can she afford all these phones on her salary at the Renaissance Riverside Hotel?
Duc Nguyen - Renaissance Riverside Hotel, Saigon, Vietnam
Too many questions, no answers. Am I angry? Of course but not enough to want me to leave Vietnam.
